A friend of mine recently espoused his joy at no longer fearing talking with Fortune 500 CEOs. This friend, of course is an Engineer-type. It struck me that many engineers do IN FACT fear talking with non-engineer types. It may be the single biggest thing holding back good engineer-types from being awesome at business. Given that somehow, I have learned to deal with “No.”, I thought I’d share my own feelings on dealing with no, and handling setbacks.

1.) It is damn hard.
2.) It takes a lot of “no”, followed by a few “yes”… time and time again, before you understand what it REALLY takes to handle “no”.
3.) It takes the BELIEF that today’s no, MUST BE… for tomorrows yes to happen.
4.) It takes optimism, faith, and an inner comfort with ones-self that the “NO” is not at ‘you’.
5.) It MUST energize you, rather than demoralize you.

Recently, I’ve started a new business. I’m expecting 100+ no’s before I get a single yes, no matter what I’m asking. It’s normal. It must be so. I hope to learn from the no’s to get better and refine my ideas… I will press on those who say no with “why”… I will try to uncover the ‘bottleneck’ of my goal.

Sometimes a ‘no’ seems like a setback. If this is the case, you’ve put too much stake into this particular ‘possibility’ than you should. Real setbacks are based only on litigation or your imagination. What I mean is a setback cannot be based on any one event, unless you give up (out of imagination), or are LITERALLY forced to give up (Legislation, as in Jail or Death). Persistence is really the key to any and all possible “yes”.

Let rejection energize you, for today’s no really is tomorrow’s yes.